How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
