Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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