Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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