ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
