"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I'm eating all of the evidence.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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