i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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