My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I wish you could order shots online.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
