escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
You made out with two different species that night
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
