New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
