I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
FUCK WHALES
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
