Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
My ATM looks so different sober.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Holy shit dude........stairs
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
