I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
