Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
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