How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
