Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize