To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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