I think I just saw someone hide a body.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
