South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
