You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
