So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
