batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize