just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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