i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize