Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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