Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
