Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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