If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Still dying that you shit outside
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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