I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
