I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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