Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
