sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
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