I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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