What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
