Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
