I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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