Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
