you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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