break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I enjoy the company of your penis
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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