Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Randomize
