It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
