Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Randomize
