Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I'm way too hungover for life right now
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
