I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
You pole danced in your parka.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
