you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
