all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Randomize
