I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
