i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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