yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
