Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
