Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize