I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
