it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
