do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
