Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
